Sure, I have plenty of things to talk about, but I might as well start with the most interesting topic. It also happens to be the one topic that I can’t get out of my head. I just figured I’d warn you that this post is going to get more and more boring as it goes along. But, it will hopefully be able to satiate John’s need for input.

I just spoke with Jamie a few hours ago. It’s getting more and more difficult to talk with her. You would think that it would get easier, but it doesn’t. I feel very alone after I speak with her. It’s not the kind of alone that I was prepared for. I mean, I knew she would find someone. And, yeah, that bothers me, but it’s bearable. What I hadn’t prepared for was the loneliness that is resulting from my realization that the Jamie that I dated no longer exists. I don’t know. I guess there is something comforting in knowing that characters from your past still exist. I’m not exactly sure what to do about the current situation. I mean, it’s not my place to really _do_ anything. Besides, I don’t really want to be involved. But, I wish things were working out differently. I apologize for the vagueness of this entry. I just don’t think it fair to really go into detail here. It’s a shame because it’s the details that really hurt.

Moving on. I went to a hardcore show the other day. It was the first one that I had been to in a while. It was nice to go back to one – for many reasons. It’s nice to be around a whole bunch of people who are straight edge. It’s interesting to go from a world where it is so weird to be straight edge to one where it is almost expected. There’s something about hardcore that is different from every other type of music that I’ve come across. It’s not so much about the music, but about the community. There is a real sense of comradery. I think it might be due to the raw emotion that is present in the music. When you see someone put so much emotion into creating (or listening) to music, it can really move you. I’m not saying that this makes it any better than other forms of music, just that I don’t get this kind of feeling from other genres. One of the kids had a shirt on that said, “Suicide Before Betrayal” on it. Now, it was just a t-shirt, but I’ve been thinking about its meaning since I saw it. Why can’t all friendships be that strong. Why does it feel like it’s a common thing to betray someone. I almost got into a fist-fight at the show. That is pretty odd for a few reasons: #1 I don’t get into fights and #2 Who gets into a fight at a hardcore show? Regarding #1, I just don’t ever get into fights. I didn’t get into any fights all through high school or anything like that. With that being said, I’m almost looking forward to getting into a fight. Maybe I just want to feel what it’s like to get punched in the face. Maybe I’ve watched Fight Club a few too many times. Regarding #2, for the most part, hardcore shows are peaceful things. I mean, there’s a lot of rage and emotion, but respect is a major element of the hardcore scene. I don’t really want to get into the “Mark’s mosh etiquette” rant right now, but this guy at the show was being a real dick. Basically, you should only dance with other people that want to dance. All the kids that are standing on the side of the pit don’t really want to dance and they don’t really want to catch your fist in their face. So, keep a respectful distance and everyone will be happy. Well, this guy was swinging his arms and hitting these two girls right on the side of the pit and next to me. So, I pushed him away from the girls. He came back and was swinging his arms again. So, the girls and I pushed him together, except this time he fell over. He got right up in my face and ‘fight mode’ kicked in. All of a sudden there’s a crowd of people around us and we’re staring into each other’s eyes. It was pretty intense. I loved it. Some of his buddies took him outside. His friends told me not to worry about him and that he was just having a bad day or whatever. After a few bands played and a few hours passed, he came over to me and apologized. I thought that was incredibly awesome of him. It must have taken a lot for him to do that and I really appreciate it.

I submitted a patch to sound-juicer. It doesn’t entirely fix gnome bug #153988, but it helps. It basically makes it so you can type a custom genre into sound-juicer before ripping a CD. I think the interface of sound-juicer is very refreshing and is a stellar example of what I like about the feel of Gnome. The CD-ripper is a type of program that everyone loves to throw features and awkward options into. Sound-juicer has resisted this urge and created a program that is just a joy to use. I don’t expect my patch to be accepted, but hopefully someone will find it useful. I know that I’m using it. :o)

This create your likeness as a southpark character thing has been going around the blogs the past few days. I couldn’t help myself. I made two. One of them is me in all of my bald glory and the other one is when I’m wearing my new spiffy EFF hat.

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